Holidays are the most wonderful time of the year. Except when they are not. For parents of young children, the holidays can be especially challenging, especially with kids out of school, battling sugar highs, later bedtimes, and a lack of routine.
“It’s just crazy. It’s everybody’s voices and everybody’s thoughts and there’s so much joy, but it can be a bit much, you know?” says Meg Wallace, a mother of 7 living in San Antonio, Texas.
While many parents can feel pressure to maximize the holiday break and make “holiday magic” happen for their family and friends, family therapist, Tom Kersting, suggests not overdoing it.
“We have to remember to try to keep some semblance of routine for our kids during the holiday season,” says Kersting.
But becoming overly reliant on entertaining children with electronic devices can have its downfall. Excessive screen time can contribute to obesity, sleep disturbances, and eye strain, according to the Mayo Clinic.
“Kids almost don’t know how to be bored nowadays because they’re always stimulated by a device of some sort,” says Kersting.
To avoid the “Christmas crankies” or hearing the words, “I’m bored” over the holidays, Wallace suggests including children in activity planning.
“We have this like dream list where everybody kind of writes down, I want to do ice skating, I want to make hot chocolate,” says Wallace.
Rather than setting a guideline for specific time limits on digital media use, the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) updated its media use recommendations in 2016 to recommend considering the quality of interactions with digital media and not just the quantity, or amount of time.
“I love a good movie night with our kids in pop popcorn. I love all that. But kids get really irritable. I can see just they change. Their personalities change when they’re on screens too much,” says Wallace.
Managing anger over the holidays can also be particularly challenging as parents can get swept up entertaining.
“I think as moms, it’s important to remember anger… is always the byproduct of something else, some other need not being met,” says Wallace.
To keep it all in perspective, Kersting advises his patients to practice an attitude of gratitude.
“So instead of looking at it like, I got to survive this. Look at it as a breath of fresh air,..As this is a wonderful thing,” says Kersting.
Experts also suggest parents practice self-care during the holidays.
“The part where moms can get it wrong, where we want it to be so perfect. We want everyone to be happy…. it’s not about that perfection,” says Wallace. “It really is about connecting with those that you love.”
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